Synopsis:
With more than 730 rewritten subtitles, this edit profanely and absurdly alters the story of the original Mandarin-language film. Eastern martial arts and western medieval fantasy are hustled into a lush honeymoon suite where they must show each other their privates. Orcs and zombies now populate this movie. Why? Because the subtitles say so.
Intentions:
To spray graffiti on moving pictures. The original movie explored earnest themes, including the recklessness of youth, the complicated nature of student-pupil relationships, and the restricted lives of women. This edit replaces such worthy considerations with an alternate story line.
Change List:
Added more than 730 subtitles. Removed a whole lot of dialogue-intensive scenes, removed the marriage subplot, leaving the fight scenes intact between. . . a whole lot of talking. Removed the characters for “tiger” and “hidden” from the title screen and added the modified English title in the same font as the original. Several audio issues, including overly loud dialogue during a fight scene and brief audio/video asynchrony, exist in the original movie; these problems remain uncorrected.
Additional Notes:
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Other Sources:
Special Thanks:
To blueyoda and Neglify for reviewing the workprint and providing invaluable feedback. To Captain Khajiit for industrial-strength technical wisdom. To Brumous, Gatos, geminigod, juice4z0, L8wrtr, Neglify, Q2, reave, Stankpac, theslime, ThrowgnCpr, and wabid for additional technical guidance. To emphatic for translating this obscenity into Swedish. To my family for putting up with this project. To Ang Lee and the original cast and crew for playing it straight, by which they were clearly anticipating the release of this farcical version years later.